The beer hisses upon opening
Cold and refreshing
I sip it slowly
Not a comfort I was used to
I watch the feed hiss and stutter
I saw a man in black
Confident stride
Something predatory in the gait
‘Doesn’t mean he’s coming here…’
I lie to myself
Then he stopped to look in a window
I saw what he carried
Like a briefcase spilling out with wires
‘Fuck… fuck me…’
I remember what Novak had said
“If they send someone
And you see them coming
Leave the window open
And make sure you leave the feed running
Then press the button and leave”
This is fine
This is okay
“Fuck fuck fuck”
I slide open the window
Winter crawling in
Like a cat
Then run to the desk
Reach beneath
Finding micro switch
Click
“Fuck me fuck fuck…”
I pull up cloth
And grab jacket
“Fucking Sandman
Of all the fucking…”
The door closes softly behind me
I strut quickly down
Two floors
Straight for the front door
The door opens
I collide with him
And my heart stops
‘Oh I’m fucking dead’
His face contorts
In killer rage
“Oh soz darl!”
I chime as cheerily as I can
My heart pounding in my ears
“Watch yer fuckin’ step!”
That is not the accent
I had anticipated
He reigns in that killer instinct
I can see it cool slightly
“Get
Out”
He snaps
and gestures
I slip past
And run
I run so fast
So hard
Harder than I thought I could
Then it happens
A blast of heat and air
Far off now
But for sure the apartment
Gone in a wave of fire and smoke
“Fuck everything fuck fuck!”
I don’t stop running for hours
I am so scared
Did he notice?
Did he realize?
Or did Novak’s deception work?
I stop beneath an overpass
A few others are down here
Sipping something from tin cans
Around a barrel fire
Almost Dickens-esque
I breath slowly
Deliberate
Slow my heart rate
I press a finger to my temple
Accessing the public library
Dickens is exactly what I need
I pull up A Christmas Carol
And feel my whole body relax
The only thing I need is internet access
‘I’ll talk to Novak tomorrow…’
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